2005-about my relationship with the Divine, with God. I'm already good enough. I don't have to be perfect to be loved. I think I've mentioned this before, it went from far away to inside.
2007- relationships with other people. In both 2005 and 2007 I was in situations where I was flat-out told that "I hadn't earned the right be be treated well, " more or less. So, in 2007, in Spain, I continually was welcomed in by strangers, accepted because I existed. I was loved because I was, I didn't have to "prove" myself or "earn" it. (This actually has alluded me until this morning.) And if anyone ever tries to tell you that you have to "earn" their love, please find the strength to walk away. It's bullshit.
2009- Trust. It goes back to both 2005 and 2007, just on a much deeper level. This was tough, I'm pretty sure I lost a couple friends over this trip, one, I don't care, the other I'd like to make ammends with. I actually asked for the hardship on this one, I had said that I had wanted to "walk in the wilderness with Christ" for the 40 days of Lent. And I did. It was a struggle. It was emotionally painful, and also really rewarding. I know I was/am loved. (Hard to know how things you put out into the world will be answered. I can see the humor in it now, because I lived through it, but at the time I was often in a state of panic.)
2011-Physical healing, I think. And just being in Herbon was beautiful. (and I let myself be a tourist, and that was actually enjoyable and I connected more with locals, especially in Lisbon and Porto.)-Portugal/Spain. Oh, and laughing.
2013- was in Finland, and oh my, the world is a magical place, so much more than expected.
I've posted this in another blog, but this sums up Finland for me. Last sunset before I came home.
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| Last night in Finland/L Herlevi 2012 |
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